Satanosphere, the Archives || Oh shit, it's Xmas or something, isn't it?

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Oh shit, it's Xmas or something, isn't it?
By matt, Section Satanosphere Posted on Fri Dec 23rd, 2005 at 01:49:04 PM PDT

Right, just wanted to send out a heartfelt "Happy Holidays!" to all you Satanousers out there from the Satanosphere staff. The site's getting busy again, which is good. It's beena fine year with fewer births than last year (bastards). That being said, I know alot of you are having things turn around in your lives right now, for good or bad. At Thanxgiving, you're sposed to go around the table and list shit you're thankful for. Since the site is a virtual turkey dinner with gravy, why not use this chance to post to your other satanouser what you're thankful for?

Go on, get mushy. It's that time of the year!

< Stop the Spamming. (8 comments) | Don't let it die! (2 comments) >

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Oh shit, it's Xmas or something, isn't it? | 7 comments (7 topical, 0 editorial, 0 hidden)

I'll Start (none / 0) (#1)
by King Dinosaur (KingD@Hailtotheking.com) on Fri Dec 23rd, 2005 at 04:13:44 PM PDT
(User Info) http://www.kingdinosaur.com

I'm thankful for the ever-amazing human capacity for forgiveness. Thank you to all my friends for sticking around through all my tantrums, mood-swings, depressions, deceits, conceits, ego-tripping, low-self-esteeming and just plain cantankerousnessing.

And I'm thankful for an alternative to Christmas for those that are fed up.

Happy Festivus!

"It ain't no broken." - Scott Taylor

Oh, and... (none / 0) (#2)
by King Dinosaur (KingD@Hailtotheking.com) on Fri Dec 23rd, 2005 at 04:35:49 PM PDT
(User Info) http://www.kingdinosaur.com

...thanks to everybody for your condolences.

"It ain't no broken." - Scott Taylor
[ Parent ]

No! (none / 0) (#3)
by Paul Shrug (paulshrug@YourSadCareerAsASpammer.gmail.com) on Fri Dec 23rd, 2005 at 09:58:48 PM PDT
(User Info) http://museumpoparch.blogspot.com

I already gave you my thankful lists, Hicks... three of 'em. Plus they've all been sold to Reader's Digest for their "Humor in Uniform" column (before you ask, I wore scrubs to the pitch meeting).

Instead, how about I give you one of my patented year-end Top 10 lists? Like... I don't know, something like... maybe.....

Paul Shrug's Favorite 10 Character Suggestions for Future Chapters of R Kelly's "Trapped in the Closet":

Mike, the bipolar electrician
Dolores, the insatiable claims adjuster
Traci, the plain-looking kleptomaniac administrative assistant
Antonio, the oversexed ambassador to Luxembourg
Mr. Bingles, the incontinent kiddie clown
Samantha, the girl at the salad bar who is legally prohibited from handling a set of tongs
G-Morph, the bacterium that turned into a rap star after a janitorial accident
CX222-57B, the computer chip who's wanted for armed robbery
Cookie, the clairvoyant French poodle
The entire population of Tumwater, Washington

(On the off-chance you have no idea what "Trapped in the Closet" is, here. It is the comedy smash of the year. It's as funny as The 40-Year-Old Virgin.)

--Shrug
Now Doing Weddings And Irony

LOL (none / 0) (#4)
by Starwing on Fri Dec 23rd, 2005 at 11:14:08 PM PDT
(User Info)

Samantha: the girl at the salad bar who is legally prohibited from handling a set of tongs

That's just fucking hysterical....

S T A R W I N G
There are 10 kinds of people in the world:
Those who understand binary, and those who don't.
[ Parent ]

exclusive lyric from Chapter 15 (none / 0) (#5)
by Paul Shrug (paulshrug@YourSadCareerAsASpammer.gmail.com) on Fri Dec 23rd, 2005 at 11:39:11 PM PDT
(User Info) http://museumpoparch.blogspot.com

"I told this PYT I wanted some chickpeas
So I said 'Baby, can you give me some please?'
She said 'Yeah'
But then she said 'Oh'
Then I said 'What?'
Then she said 'No'
'See I had this little accident in 2003
When I was just an intern attending an open-heart surgery
And I dropped some tongs into this sucka's cavity
Now his pelvis makes a squeaking noise when he has to pee
So I can't use no tongs on you baby
But here's my number if you wanna have a menage-a-three'
I said 'That's fly, hope you like midgets'
She said 'Long as there's a hundred or so for me in it'"
So we went back in the clo-SET
We went back in the clo-SET
We stormed back in clo-SET
We goose-stepped into the clo-SET...

(Sigh) They don't write 'em....

--Shrug
Now Doing Weddings And Irony
[ Parent ]

adec (none / 0) (#6)
by maximedia (ADEC) on Sun Feb 26th, 2006 at 10:27:10 AM PDT
(User Info) http://www.agdrtv.com/

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Diary (none / 0) (#7)
by hnly0001 on Wed Mar 15th, 2006 at 06:47:16 PM PDT
(User Info)